It is Ok to Grieve

Every few months I write a column for the PBA Solo and Small Firm Section newsletter. I was very late in writing this month, and I really didn’t know what to write. As I sat and thought about the message I wanted to share, I realized that the best message I could offer was one of solidarity. One in which I said, no matter what you are feeling, no matter what you are grieving, it is ok to grieve.

Here is that portion of my column.

As I sat down to write my message today, many thoughts ran through my mind. This is a year that escapes description. A year that has only a few months left but promises to bring yet more uncertainty and concern. Right at this moment we are mourning the tragic loss of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg and can expect a difficult confirmation for the next Justice. The upcoming election has strong feelings on all sides. We continue to lose loved ones due to COVID-19. And we all continue to struggle with our response to issues related to systemic racism in our justice system.

What message, I wondered, should I offer you during this time? In the end, I have decided that the best message I can offer you is that it is ok to grieve.

It is ok to grieve:

The loss of friends, loved ones, and over 200,000 people in the United States and hundreds of thousands more from around the world due to COVID-19

  • The difficulty you and your children are having with their education
  • If you are still stuck working at home and cannot see clients in person
  • Your child’s inability to walk at graduation, attend the prom, or engage in sports and social activities
  • The loss of your job or your business
  • The need to cancel vacations, weddings, parties, and all sorts of events
  • The lack of civility that has overwhelmed our national discourse
  • The loss of life and unrest around the United States

It is ok to grieve all these things and more. You most certainly do not need my permission to feel grief, but sometimes it helps to hear that it is alright to have strong feelings. Your feelings are as valid as everyone else’s. No matter what it is you are missing or have lost.

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